yui_miyamoto: (Default)
[personal profile] yui_miyamoto
Fandom:  Dive!! / ダイブ
Title:  inside your sea of Blue.
Pairing:  Youichi x Tomo
Rating:  PG
Description:  When did the water and Tomo become One in Youichi's eyes? 


Disclaimer:  Dive is written by Mori Eto.


I knew from the moment
Our eyes met
It was the beginning
and the end of

Everything I’d known
about anything
until then.

I believed in you more
than anything I’d ever hoped for,
an ideal that shouldn’t have been.
Your shining figure
smiling looking down
at the water in your hands.

I lost my heart right then.

I was never able to recover it.
But as time passed,

I knew I’d exchanged it
for something much greater
than what I could’ve ever wished for.

Yeah, more than this lifetime
could ever encompass
the longer I stare at life
not only through mine,

but our eyes.

Thank you

for existing
in this world.


inside your sea of Blue.
By Miyamoto Yui

“You’re such an idiot.”

I run my fingers through my hair as I look up to the diving board.  It’s always blocking my vision towards the stars.

But actually, by luring me to climb it, I discovered a whole new universe only few are called to experience.

Within the serenity of the night, I hold my head and continue to stare wondering why my heart can’t stop pumping wildly through my veins, a separate entity altogether.  As if wanting to push the constraints of the flesh and skin blocking its pathways. 
My cheeks feel the effects with the sparkling fire spreading throughout the rest of my body. 

“So you never had a girlfriend?  That’s hard to believe.”

It was a disappointment by itself, but to hear it aloud and from someone else’s mouth was a completely different matter.  It crossed my mind, but I never gave those kinds of things a second thought because they weren’t a part of the benchmarks leading to my goal.
The irony of it all is that I…

I begin to laugh.

…have been cheating on one with the other.

Though, in a sense, they dissolve into One inside my mind.

Looking down at the pool, I kneel down to touch the water and tenderly run my fingers through it.  This place has seen my personal triumphs, witnessed too many injuries to list, and wrapped itself around me more times than I can count.  This is my sanctuary and my hell. 
I’m too in love with the water to think of anything outside of it.  When I was younger, there were times I thought that life on land was an interruption to the one I had here.

Then, one day, I couldn’t take it anymore.  While accompanying my father to one of his high school coaching lessons, the water kept on beckoning for me to play with it.  Recklessly, I jumped in and joy welled up from a place I didn’t know existed.  I smiled up at my dad even though he scolded me with an earnest expression on his face:  Pleased that I’d chosen the water for myself.

Well, that was all true until the day you’d shown up.

My rival for the love of this water within this five-meter pool. 
For diving with all I could bleed.

I didn’t care about the sacrifices I made as long as I was the one choosing them, until they were embedded into my lifestyle.  The way I ate, the way I thought, the way I conducted my whole existence revolved around this liquid that slipped elusively through my fingers.
Or so I had thought.

Things came to a halt the instant I panicked when I thought you’d quit.  Even though I acted cool while advising you, my chest almost strained itself from the very thought of losing not only my rival, but something which had yet to be named.
Somehow, I had to convince you to stay.  To me, you were the one true adversary I’d acknowledged until Shibuki showed up.  There were others.  There will be others to come in the near future, but I’d watched you from the time you came to the gates while I stood on this very platform.

I knew you had potential.  I didn’t know if you even dove, but I extended the invitation because I felt it from my head to my toes and the tingling of my fingertips, a voltage of energy extending through the fenced gate.  You had the same eyes I did when I dove in that high school swimming pool.

At first glance, you were ready to fall in love.

And I was right.  With all your enthusiasm, drive, and hard work, you entered without a second thought.  I’d known for a long time talent didn’t mean anything if you weren’t willing to put in the effort, but for you, it wasn’t that at all. 

You wanted something more than the world could offer.  The only thing you cared about was the present, the dive itself.
And I enjoyed the look of ecstasy on your face every time you challenged yourself.  I was proud I was the one who awakened that emotion for this place.  Whether I was looking up or down, my eyes constantly moved towards your figure, hoping you’d be right there.

So without my knowledge, when did you start fighting for the place only the water occupied?

That alluring look of admiration, the one that kept pulling me to unseal my soul…

Though I denied it, those rare times my body would protest and feel heavy or I couldn’t mentally take all the pressures squeezing my mind, the single reason I came was because of you.
But the days passed into years until you stood in front of me shouting, “I want to be number one!” 

You finally recognized me as your opponent.  I watched in fascination and melancholy as your eyes transformed from ones of silent adoration to the hunter:  You’d have to defeat me.
I was within your scope.  You’d finally seen me the way I’d always viewed you.

You met the real me.  The one that always resided here in this pool.

Your voice echoed through me as I looked at you.  It rushed inside, broke the door of my soul, and locked it with you holding the key. 

From that very second, the water and you became one.

The day before the Olympic qualifier meet in Kobe, while going up the stairs you gripped onto the railing and turned to me with the sun almost stinging my eyes.  “What will you do when I surpass you?”
“Of course, I’d fight right back,” I smoothly answered with my heart skipping a beat.

The person who claimed you before the world knew you was me!

And now, that time has come.  I have to accept the world finally noticing you.

Releasing the water from my palm, I watch it drip away while standing up.  I then turn to hear Tomo coming with his travel bag.
“Sorry you had to wait for me.”
“No, not at all.  Thanks for staying so that I could practice a bit more.”

And to keep you to myself for a little bit longer.

“No, thank you for letting me stay so that I could practice too!” he happily replies.  “These days, I have to make myself tired or else I can’t go to sleep from the excitement!  So yeah, thanks.”

I shake my head.  “You even said you’d leave early with me for the competition.”
“I’d never let you go alone, Youichi.”
He says this with a latent shade of solemnness that I look over and observe his profile.

Or am I imagining it?

“Why the serious face?”  I ruffle his hair for both of our sakes.  “You know if you keep admiring me, your win will become null and void.  You won’t be able to beat me on the worldwide stage.”
“I have to.  You’re part of the concrete dragon.”  He turns to me, but now there’s a slightly confident curve on his lips.
“That right?”  I point overhead to the platform above us.
“I’ve got to rescue the prince from there.”

I blink at him.  He’s looking straight at me, but I feel a surge of feelings reach out for me, grabbing the rest of me he hadn’t captured before. 

Why are there never any doubts whenever you look at me, Tomo?

“What do you mean?”
“Forget it.  It’s…it’s something stupid.”  Embarrassed, he grips onto his bag.  “Come on, let’s go before the Narita Express leaves us behind.”

On the train ride, we talk of other things, but he never mentions it again and I’m kept wondering what he’d meant.  I can’t ask him though I’m dying to.
I’m honestly afraid of the answer I’ll get. 

So…this is what true fear feels like it.

The water always accepts me as I am.  It’ll overwhelm me and I’ll fight back, but it will always be there whenever I need it.

But if you reject me as your opponent, your friend, or something more…
It doesn’t matter which one you’ll accept or push away…

All that’s certain is that there will be change.  And whether or not you’ll stay isn’t guaranteed.  But I guess that’s what entices me to keep persisting, confident in pretending you’ll stay with me.

As long as we keep each other in sight.

The endless plane ride brings us to our destination and we take a taxi to the hotel.  I don’t know who to thank, but I’m grateful to my father and the coaches for allowing us to come a day earlier before meeting them in the Olympic village on the pretense of having a cheaper flight. 
Before the promotions.  Before all the changes are set in stone.  Before being swept up by what this new world has to offer. 

I’m just asking for breathing space, but I’m glad you agreed to come with me.

Unpacking, I take a deep breath while taking secret glimpses of you.

I asked you to come because, for now, only a small group of people know you, but after they televise your face, you’ll start to belong to them.  From then on, I’ll have to compete with them too for your attention.

And the eyes I’ve depended on will no longer be mine alone.

Will I really see all this unfold without a protest?

+/+/+/+/+/

As you sleep, I lightly touch your mattress and you stir, mumbling incomprehensibly with a cute grin.

Taking my hand away, I head over to the window.  I can’t help but watch the blinking lights below.  The world is moving in peace, waiting for the dawn to come.
I know I should be sleeping, but I can’t.  My dreams of this moment and you crash against one another, becoming flickering fireworks in my hands.

I want to say so much to you, but it all disappears when you face me head on.  I’ve always been confident with everything I’ve ever done, but once I cross over this line, we can’t ever go back.

I’ve been waiting a long time for us to come here, but what I didn’t anticipate was once we’ve achieved it, was this the point of divergence?  We’d still be a team, but we’d be on different paths from now on.

One where you’ll still love diving, but had to find someone else to admire.  One that the world accepts inside another box of its restraints.

Most likely one that doesn’t involve me.

Before, I had an excuse while you had a girlfriend or that you had no time because we’d been training all this time.

But yes…I never wanted to acknowledge the instant you’d surpass me.  Because that would mean your focus would no longer be on me.  And even though we’ll be chasing one another trying to push each other’s limits, you’d probably never see me the special way I’ve seen you.

Knowing that hurt more than everything else I could ever think of.

Glancing at the ceiling, I try to keep my composure, wondering if anyone hears me screaming in solitude inside this hotel room…

“Youichi?” 
“Yeah?”
“Why aren’t you asleep?”  I hear the creaking of the bed as you slowly sit up on the side.  “Opening ceremonies will start soon.”
“I will.  Soon.”
Looking back at the window with one hand on the icy surface, I emptily watch the anticipation below floating up invisibly to the sky.

Suddenly, you stand on the chair, hugging me from behind while putting your head on my shoulder.  You watch the people outside with me.  “It’s very pretty from up here, isn’t it?”
“Stop messing around.”  I pretend to push you away.  “Fine, I’ll go to b-“
Softly, you whisper into my ear, “Coach Asaki told me once that if I’d known something was precious, I would have taken care of it from the very beginning.”
“Lately, you’ve been saying a lot of things that don’t make sense…”

Clenching onto me, you close your eyes tightly like a child making a wish.  My whole body becomes tense while holding my breath.  I know you’re going to say something important as the palm of your hand presses upon my heart. 

“Thank you.”
“For what?”  Gulping, I observe your reflection with a sweet expression on your face, your teeth showing in the window.
“For calling out to me to join your world.”
“But diving isn’t mine,” I started to chuckle, shaking my head.

You open your eyes, looking deeply into me.  You’re trembling as you lean forward, your warm lips touching my cheek.  “But you’ve been mine for a long time, didn’t you know that?” 

And without a reason, I scrunch up my eyes to hinder the truth from bursting to flood out from the depths of my being. 

But I fail. 

Opening my eyes, some tears escape in full view, and you just continue to grin at me.
“If you keep saying things like that, I’ll start to take you seriously.”
“I thought you already did.”  This time you kiss me with your tongue scorching my mouth.

From when, I wonder,
did you take over my heart,
drowning me,

losing myself
inside your sea of
Blue?

Eyeing you, your fingers run through my hair awkwardly, trying so hard to savor the taste of my soul…

Outside, the dawn has yet to swallow the darkness, but I find myself kissing your shoulder blade, pulling you close towards my chest before falling asleep.  With the dots of colors still glimmering outside, I question, “Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah?”  You bury your forehead into my arms. 
“I’ve always wanted to ask why weren’t you scared to come back after the accident.  Why weren’t you traumatized?”
“Well…” You begin to blush, the patch of heat igniting onto my skin.  “…because nothing would hold me back from diving.  And I knew you were there waiting for me.  I had to get back.”
“Oh…”
“I wouldn’t let you take the concrete dragon alone, prince.”
“Prince?  Is that what you call me in your mind?”
“I know that this is a solo sport.  One that you’ve got to do it for, by, and with yourself.  After all, you’re the one who told me and reminded me over and over again…but…”
“But?”
“Even though you’re quiet, the longer I’ve stayed in this world, I slowly understood the steps you took to get here.  So I’m sure you were fighting a long time by yourself.” 
“Why are you always thinking about me, Tomo?”
“You’re the reason I’ve come this far, Youichi.  You’re the one that opened this window for me.” 

My heart flutters as I raise myself up to look down at you at the same time you roll onto your back to glance up at me with a smile, seeing my crimson face. 
“I want to be here to see it with you.”

To hide my embarrassment, I begin to tickle your sides.  Even then, you watch me with adoring eyes, your whole being laughing from the deepest part of yourself.  The pure delight touches me, gliding seamlessly to every part of me.

I kiss you all over again.  Licking your neck as your mouth opens to moan into my ear, I press inside you even harder.  You reach out to grab the back of my head, gently pulling me towards you…

Thank you, Tomo…
I promise you won’t ever regret it.


Owari. / The End.
--
Author’s note: Ah…the opening…it was like when I first watched Evangelion and knew I’d love the anime/manga before the first episode started.  That’s how I felt with Dive. 

As I watched, I could feel a fic forming, though I wasn’t sure if it’d be shounen ai or not.  But regardless, I knew I had to write at least one for this series!  It was very beautiful to me.  Well, probably because I love water, the beach, and the color ocean blue. 
And then while I was writing, I thought, “Ah, there it is.  The jewel I was looking for.”  So yes, I do know that it’s quite fluffy and romantic, but I went along with it anyway because right now, I feel comfortable.  (Wow 2021, we’re doing well if this is the third waffy fic of the year!)

I write to let out my feelings, and though the fics evolved throughout these years, I’m so grateful to know I can now give warmth beyond the angst.  That I could come to this point amazes even me.  Whatever sacrifices to get here, I was able to grasp more than I’d exchanged for.

So thank you for reading!

Love always,
Yui

2/21/2021 3:07:06 PM – Los Angeles
2/22/2021 8:07:06 AM – Tokyo

Profile

yui_miyamoto: (Default)
yui_miyamoto

April 2026

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12 13 14 151617 18
19 20 21 22232425
2627282930  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Apr. 27th, 2026 03:14 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios